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Moms Under Pressure

Mommy Juice is a brand of wine aimed at mommies who are too busy to manage the arduous task of choosing a wine.

Being a Mom is a constant juggling act. Whether it’s playdates and homework, diapers and burp cloths, or finding that perfect balance between work and home, Moms everywhere deserve a break. So tuck your kids into bed, sit down and have a glass of MommyJuice…

Mommy Juice was developed by a mommy with wine industry marketing experience. Every new mom goes through a period of insanity, when the details of life seem simultaneously banal and profoundly meaningful. Perhaps it was after watching the damned kid spit up on herself for about the 5 millionth time; maybe it was after two hours of bouncing the little bastard up and down in an effort to get him to shut up, for cryin’ out loud. Whatever, this admirably entrepreneurial mommy decided there’s a business in this.

Specifically, in a brand aimed at mommies for whom wine is a last connection with the adult world. “Mommy juice,” she and her mom-friends call it, cute like it comes in a sippy cup but with all of them knowing how important that alcoholic blast is at the end of the day. There had to be millions of women just like them, barf-speckled and holding desperately to that quiet moment between the kids going down and their husbands’ pathetic sexual advances.

So: Mommy Juice.

The red is a Bordeaux blend from California’s Central Coast and the white is — you’re going to want to sit down for this — a Chardonnay. No, really. A Chardonnay from Monterrey County. Do you think average suburban women will drink something as outré as Chardonnay?

Also, there’s a pre-packaged marketing campaign for Mother’s Day.

Ten bucks a bottle, for mommies who don’t have a Paxil prescription.


  • Wine Curmudgeon

    So maybe we should have some sort of competition with all the mommy wines — this wine, Little Black Dress, Mommy’s Time Out, etc. Or only let Mommy’s do the tasting for the competition.

  • Brooklyn Mommy

    Well the world has finally come to it’s senses and started marketing Mommy Juice! and Tom Johnson is doing what he loves! Are we there yet?

    Xoxo Heidi

  • Cheryl Durzy

    Glad you like the name. It was inspired by my kids…and they are, well, geniuses in my opinion.

    Ps. The Chardonnay is unoaked, so not your typical hiding-the-flaws oaky swill. It’s fruity and refreshing. Would love for you to try it! Cheers!

  • Tom Johnson

    I’m not sure, technically, that I said I liked the name. My first reaction was: if I want mommy juice, I’ve got a wife of my own I can squeeze. And I tried to make a posting out of that but no matter how I wrote the joke it came out grosser than I intended.

    I’m not sure, in fact, that I have any opinion at all on the subject except that I admire your civility when a wiseacre like me jumps in about a project you clearly take more seriously than I do.

    Good luck, and thanks for the comment.

  • Brooklyn Mommy

    Cheryl, I emailed you from your web site to take this off Toms blog. I Will order Mommy juice!

    Tom, of all the strange names for wine, this one actually makes a lot of sense to me, a mom, who loves, well, mommy juice! I have a lot more quips in me, but for now, I’ll refrain!

    Hugs to all from me. Xoxo

  • Tom Johnson

    I’m having a little trouble with the mechanics of your transaction there, Brooklyn. You emailed her to get this posting off my blog? How does that work, exactly?

  • Brooklyn Mommy

    Taking “off blog” means not putting mind-numbing girl talk on the comments of your very serious blog… ;0) Not to “get anything off this blog” as my words may have implied…


  • Tom Johnson

    Ah. Nevermind.

  • Cheryl

    Like it or not you wrote about it and posted the label. Thanks for that. I am trying to spread the word and looks like I got a new customer with Brooklyn Mommy.

    I had actually never heard of your blog…until I saw your article. But someone at a conference yesterday had it up on powerpoint slide referring to an article, so I figure someone must read ya.

    (And that is, of course, in jest.)

    Cheers. And don’t feel bad that you don’t “get” MommyJuice. Most guys don’t. But there are over 4500 people (and growing quickly) that follow it on Facebook that

  • Cory

    I love Mommy Juice wines. And I’m a dad. Go figure.