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Top Five Reasons the White House is No Longer Disclosing Wine Lists

The White House recently announced it will not release wine lists for state dinners. Here are the Top 5 reasons why the White House wine list is now a state secret:

  1. President’s bias toward Illinois wine threatens electoral prospects in neighboring Indiana.
  2. Plot to distract Republican base from forged birth certificate
  3. Fred Franzia was a huge campaign contributor, would be pissed to know White House opted for Black Box
  4. Doesn’t want to cause a run on Kendall-Jackson Vintner’s Reserve Chardonnay before they get the cellar re-filled
  5. Sprinkler system went off in the White House cellar, all the labels soaked off and it’s pretty much pot luck on the wine

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